Half Sweet n' Half Nuts

It's been a while since I wrote anything at all. It isn't all about the lack of time or the energy to write. It's more a case of not having a single original thought in a while. Nothing worth writing about that is.

In all honesty I haven't read any of the other blogs in a while either, but that is only because of lack of time.

I flew out to see a friend this morning, quite literally at a moments notice. I have huge plans to spend huge amounts of money over the next few months. Money I'm not sure I have actually. Yet spend it I will and in spite of this predicament I'm still being whimsical and flighty, taking last minute trips to see friends that too quite unnecessarily. How will I manage the next few months? I have no idea.

I'm being sucked into a black hole of workaholism. Nothing seems to matter as much anymore. It's given me a purpose to live through each day, even though I do nothing really critical or life changing. I am getting paid good money which I have no time to spend. Yet not enough for all the plans that are in my head. Plans that I don't have enough money or time for.

Time. It feels like I'm running out of time. It feels as if the end of this year will bring with it the end of a lifetime. I don't know what I'm babbling about at the moment but there is just so much to do before this year ends and I feel like I need to be in too many places at once and there just isn't enough of me to go around.

This isn't the life I had worked or planned for. It's not like I had wanted too much more out of life. But maybe I wanted something different. Am I unhappy? Not really. So does it matter that what I had wanted isn't what I got? May be it does. May be it doesn't.

Maybe its time for me to put away the wine and go to sleep :)

Oh! And before I forget -- the thought that inspired me to write today - I realized something last night. I can be a write at any stage of my life. It is the one plan that I don't need to put a time limit or constraint on. I can be married or single, busy as a bee or jobless, I can be young or old, I can be anything and I can still be a writer. How awesome is that?